Week Five

How about that? Another week down. This week went by unbelievably fast. I guess that's a good thing right? And its the weekend right?? Well kinda. I have an 11 hour day at work tomorrow. I'm not looking forward to waking up at the same time I get up for school to go in early just to go to a meeting where ABSOLUTELY nothing gets accomplished except people complaining about policies that haven't changed in 5 years. Quite honestly its not worth my hourly wage while I'm there. I digress...

This week went pretty well actually. I was crazy busy, hence the no updates since last Friday. The major development in my week was that I took over the Liberty and Law class for a unit on the Legislative Branch. If you haven't read yet, Lib and Law is my DEFINITE weak point. I haven't had a class involving that in four years. Yeah I know that's a long time, you don't have to tell me. I have basically had to fake like I know what I'm doing for the last three days. I've been spending a couple hours each night trying to miraculously understand the material in the text book (my apartment living room looks like I'm in the middle of a research assignment). Maybe 30% of the time, I've been comfortable talking in front of the kids about the material. Luckily most of them know the drill and they do well by me. Again, even with this class of juniors they are more interested in where I get my suits, or if I look like "this" all the time. Its strange really. 

My honors history classes have gone alright as well. We spent a day in the library, letting them have a preview of some online research tactics (which I'm awful at). It was weird working with the librarians. They were nice enough, but Jesus how they wasted time! They would think that it grew on the bloody trees! Basically while they spent an 15 extra minutes showing the kids the reference section they will NEVER USE, the kids started worrying about completing the assignment I gave them. Then while the librarians explained how to use the databases they would use, the kids didn't pay attention because they were trying to research their topic to make up lost time. They panicked and then asked me questions NON-STOP.  It was unreal and it made my head hurt. Seriously. They should serve beer in the teacher's lounges...

I also finished up the week with our chapter test. It's unbelievable how poorly the honors students are doing considering I now hold TWO review sessions where I go over the test word for word. They still complain that they didn't have enough time to study. I mean a lot of the kids did just fine, but some...good lord. Its like they just completely guessed. It was pretty neat though: a lot of the kids did really well on the fear of Communism in America essay question I gave them. Even though I gave the answers right before the test, its still a fairly tough idea to get straight. Go them. 

I'm starting to actually feel like a teacher though. Its been an interesting development. My class of miscreant hellions are starting to settle down a little bit and understand what its like to be real students. They still have their moments though. They ask questions like you wouldn't believe. I stand up in front of the class and give directions and two minutes later I have 10 kids ask me the same questions. Their listening abilities are next to nothing. Each time they ask me a question I just want to slap them silly, but instead I smile kindly, pat them on the head, grit my teeth and tell them what they want to know. I guess my instruction techniques still need some work. Once again, thanks to the university for not covering this point AT ALL during my time there. 

OK. I've got the perfect example for how things are going in the student teaching world. Its 9:06 on a Friday night. I'm a 23 year old male who doesn't mind socializing and I only have one thing to plan for Monday. Granted, I have been out a little bit already for some dinner. Afterwards I ran into my CT and hung out. But still, right now, the only thing I can really think about is going to bed. Night night. 

Currently Listening-Wide Eyed by the Junior Varsity

Week 4: complete

Indeed, week four is complete. It was a pretty good week I suppose, at least it had pretty low stress. I saw my first faculty meeting, soup observation, open house, and then my first exit exam for the university. The faculty meeting was conveniently placed the day before my observation. They are pretty boring and could honestly be reduced to an email or two, but what the state wants, the state gets. It was an OK and all. I got to find out about the faculty meetings that take place every so often at night that involve the sharing of methods. The asst. principal sprinkled some nice rhetoric in: "If you have a good idea, its your obligation to share it with people." I almost stood up and screamed "Communist Pig!", but I figured that wouldn't go too well. I really don't care for that rhetoric. Yeah good ideas need to be spread, but an obligation? Nah, I don't care for that. I think the obligation lies with those who are looking for good ideas. 

My observation went alright. I got picked on for some things that are due to inexperience, like lack of "specific instruction", rough transitions, etc. Its cool, I can change it. I also got picked on for not having the standards on my lesson plan exactly right. Don't even get me started on the standards. I'll have to explain more when I am not so tired. Basically we have to show that we are meeting state standards, which is honestly a pretty good thing, but we have to follow guidelines to create a cover sheet for everything that we do that shows we have met the standards. So if I write a lesson plan, then I have to write a cover sheet that explains how I met the standards. Its a lot of dumb work. I don't like it one bit... 

Open House was OK. I got to meet some parents and things, give a little speech, that sort of thing. I did meet my first "pushy mom". She had a thick southern accent, most likely from Texas, boobs up to her chin, and very little understanding. It was pretty awesome listening to her ask me questions on how her daughter can do better, then interrupt me while I was giving suggestions. I think that I will get tired of that very quickly. This lady seriously made my brain hurt. If we ever meet again, things will go differently. I'll have to treat her just like a little kid and ask her to kindly let me talk. Quite honestly some of the parents looked terrible. Not like hold you up and steal your beer terrible, but more like get drunk and yell at my son because he didn't make the football team terrible. Quick judgement you say? Yep. Some faces don't lie though. 

Exit exams...forget about it. They are not graded so I did not give it "my best". There were only 36 questions...how in the world do you track 130 hours of college with 36 questions?? They were mainly reading comprehension about scientific situations and then math questions. I hate those.

I'm sleepy and need a nap. Oh yeah! I almost forgot, I've been turned on to a fantastic graphic novel that depicts the trials of the Holocaust by my awesome art-inclined lady. Its called Maus by Art Spiegelman. Evidently it won a Pulitzer. It deserves it though, its absolutely awesome. 

Currently Listening-Even if it Kills Me by Motion City Soundtrack

Currently Reading-Maus II: A Survivor's Tale by Art Spiegelman

Week Four

I had my first fun assignment for the kids today. After some discussion on propaganda, and also throughout the unit, I had the kids get down and dirty and create their own propaganda poster. Quite honestly it was a fun time. Some of them came up with some pretty decent slogans, even if they weren't executed as well as they could have been. After all, I only gave them an hour. But it was really nice to be able to step back in the room and see the kids actually working on something...together. I haven't graded them yet. I had them also write how their posters were historically and artistically significant. Let's hope they say something clever. 

I have my first observed lesson this week too. The material I am covering is the Treaty of Versailles and Wilson's 14 points. Not exactly awesome school material where I can be my "best". Oh yeah, this is interesting. My soup tells me to be ready because he wants to see me at "my best". Sounds like a good idea on the surface, but really, its a bad idea. Why would someone try to judge me one time at my very best? Does a sport team go out and spend a million dollars on some one who has one awesome game? Not usually. This creates a false impression. My best can be fabricated. I can buy off my students with something to make them stay quiet, to ask questions, blah blah. If anything, I should be seen at my worse. That seems to be more real. I'm wondering, why say anything like that? Just say I'm going to be here then. Deal with it. 

Friday I have another meeting thingy at the University. I'm not sure what I'll be doing there. "Student Forum" doesn't mean much to me. It can mean a lot of things. After that I'll be taking my university exit exams. It will be an exciting week. 

Currently Listening-I Am the Movie by Motion City Soundtrack

Ohhhh man-help me Jeebus!

I don't even know where to start. Chronologically is always best I suppose. Actually, I can't even remember the last thing I blogged about. Hang on. Ok Tuesday. Its Thursday now. Lets see-

Wednesday I got a break from the kids while the counselors borrowed them for their block and told them about databases or something. I'm not sure what really, I just graded essays the whole time. I was a little disappointed because some kids misunderstood some of the language that was used in the film. Some were pretty good though. The highlight of the day came during fourth block. The counselors got a hold of my hellion class and didn't know what to do. Mr. H. had a blast walking back and forth across the library listening to counselors vainly reason, "You are an honors class", "Be quiet!", "I can't hear!", and so on and so forth. You should have seen his smile. It was a knowing smile: now they know. Maybe now we can lose some of those kids. Honestly, its now or later, because they will fail out.

Thursday. I'm sick. All day I battled not only the cold-sickness business, but an amazing stomach problem. Go me. I probably shouldn't eat half a pizza, then chase it with Theraflu, Mucinex, Cough Drops, and Tums. Im a panicy sick though. If I'm not immediately better, I want to try something else. I had my lesson plan ready to go but it soon became derailed. Mr. H. got an email warning that Student Council speeches were Friday during first block. This means that I'd have to shave off 30 minutes somewhere. No prob. Once the kids got into the room they informed us different. Turns out they were today. The email was wrong. Good job school. So now I had to worry about what I would cut right now. Just after we finished attendance and a little reminiscing over the 11th, the fire alarm went off. "Damn it!" I barely kept it under my breath. Outside we go. We were out there for a good 20 minutes, during which I entertained a discussion where a girl was trying to decide about living in the dorms in college. I think I might have persuaded her to do it. Seriously. I had some really good times and wouldn't trade them for the world. Anyway, once we got inside it was StuCo time. I had about 20 minutes left in the class when they got back. We ended up talking about politics, then the Iraq war. I'm not good at avoiding taboo topics. I think I'm better for it. 

The problem for me now is with 1st block a day behind I have to keep 4th block in line. So we just killed some time with them with discussion, review, and a poor video. I barely got through with my sanity. Its a long story, but I have to keep the classes together so I have an easier time with my soup. 

I also learned one of the funniest things I've ever heard today. One of the teachers is a bit of an introvert. That's cool and all, but he has some weird quirks. His name is D. It used to be C. Why did he change it? No joke, he became obsessed with a certain 90s teen drama show on Fox and changed his name after one of the characters. Its not as funny without the particulars, but I need to keep this somewhat anonymous. But think about that. Who the hell does that?? I'm still laughing about it. I wish Seinfeld was still on, they would totally do a show about that.

Last but not least, let's talk about computer problems. In the middle of my lesson planning today I got the spinning beach ball (I use mac). My comp. froze like crazy and I shut 'er down. When I turned it back on I got nothing but gray screen. I didn't know what to do. My good friend B. came over and patiently got through some diagnostics with me. The problem? 80% sure its a hard drive crash. So I had to plop a not so bad $70 for a new one. Unfortunately, he couldn't retrieve any information off of it. That means I have to take it to a professional professional. That will probably cost me $100 I'm guessing, maybe more, I dunno. I probably can't pay them in fried rice and nice beer like I can B. If that doesn't work...I lose all my information on my computer, which I am currently without. All my lesson plans, my supplementary information, my music, my pictures, everything. I guess I should do back ups more often huh. FORTUNATELY for me, I printed off 90% of my lesson plans for my soup's meeting. Otherwise...forgeddaboutit. Right now I'm running my comp. off of my external hard drive with B.'s help. Its an amazing rig. It is exactly like an old man on an oxygen tank. It has to go everywhere. So whenever I take my comp to school I'll have to take my bulky HD and plug it in as well as my comp. 2x the chords 2x the space. Thank someone its Friday tomorrow. 

Currently listening-The Escape Frame by The Escape Frame-trying to get cheered up.  The lady is making banana chocolate chip muffins. That might make me happy...

Banshees controlled

Ok. So the menace that is my fourth block class has been controlled. Mr. H and I talked the business over. We decided another "talkin' to" was in order. I left early to go "make copies" so the chat could go down with me not there. When I got back, they kids seemed like whipped puppies. One even attempted a fake apology to me. How nice huh? Well, I don't know exactly what did it, but it worked. The last two days the kids have been halfway decent. We even got into a discussion today debating fate and chance in the film All Quiet on the Western Front. That definitely would not have happened last week. 

In other news, there was a pep-rally, or "assembly". It was something else and immediately made me remember the strange, embarrassed feeling I used to get in high school when we had pep rallies. I'm glad to see that nothing has changed. This one lasted quite a while, as the school has a lot of different sports, and are evidently pretty good. Unfortunately, the cheerleading squad is very weak, as well as the dance team. Maybe my judgement has changed, but these girls need a lot of work. That stuff is so hard to watch. They also played an interesting game of fun-noodle hockey, where fun-noodles are used to hit a beach ball through a goal. Sounds like fun right? I was thinking it would be more interesting if they used the noodle as a distractor and kind of badger the opponent. Mr. W. told me that they censor the events pretty heavily for violence, which that, evidently, was. I thought this was ridiculous. Then I thought it was more ridiculous as I was forced to watch underage girls, in burlesque-style makeup, with short spandex shorts and fishnet stocking dance provocatively to bad rap/dance mixes. Fun noodle fight vs. underage burlesque show. You decide.

Currently Listening-Narrow Stairs by Death Cab for Cutie

Week 3

Its official: the kids have gotten me sick. I'm battling with a sore throat and some related fatigue. I'd say that is definitely one of the unforeseen consequences of the public teaching thing. I heard sniffles all week and warned them that there better be NO transfer of germs. Too bad for me. I'm right at that point where it could be all better, or waaaay worse tomorrow when I wake up. Lucky for me I have a fairly easy week of planning. The next two days I've scheduled a movie study for AQOTWF. Wednesday the kids have some sort of grade wide counseling meeting, thus resulting in no class. So I really just have to plan for an active Thursday and Friday. What is funny is that without the immediate pressure I don't have the push to keep all my lessons up to date. But...come on! I've got my planning periods! Right? Right...As a result I've spent the day relaxing, watching the Chiefs get beat while I peck at my lesson plans for Mon and Tues. (By the way, did you know Tom Brady got hurt?? I think they might have underreported that story) And a special no thanks goes out to Laurence Maroney for sucking it up on my Fantasy Football team-another inroad to easing relationships between teachers. Also-Screw you NBC for showing what happens at the end of Season 4 of the Office, before Season 5 has started! You know DVD sales are skyrocketing...MAYBE some people have been waiting to watch it! Damn it! I'm going to bed...

Day I of actual teaching-50/50

I made it through my first day of actual teaching. Although, I wouldn't be lying if I said I enjoyed a happy hour get together where I drank my troubles away afterword. The first block of students I have are great. They are quiet, they are respectful, they let each other talk, they laugh at my jokes (as opposed to laughing at me), they don't complain, they ask good, sincere questions. My fourth block however...Jesus Christ. They are the same US Honors history, just a different consistency. These kids do the opposite of all the good qualities I just mentioned above. They have the attention span of hyper-active ADD monkeys. I'm not sure if it is the time of day, being so close to the end of the hour, my inability to hold some sort of innate authority, or if they are just an anomaly of a class. I'm leaning towards the latter actually. Several times I had to raise my voice, or stop talking to get them to shut the hell up. It was a battle for the whole period. And the questions?! My word! In the middle of the spiel on WWI alliance system I was asked, "Where are you teaching after this?". I whispered, "Don't you worry about it." During a bit on trench warfare I was asked where I got my shoes. "Dear god" I thought...its starting. All those horror stories I've heard-they are true. It happens. At moments like these you have no idea how much I want to swear at these kids. Not necessarily AT them, just sort of...towards them, you know, just to keep them in line and let them know I'm pissed off. Somehow the hour ended with me holding onto a bit of my sanity, but not by much though. Its so weird going from 5 years of university classes and behavior to a place where such an instant collapse of reason can occur. 

So today I have to adjust my strategies. All night was a constant psychological chess game where I make moves, but never take my hand of the piece and I lost some sleep because of it. I mainly fantasized wildly about having a yelling fit in front of them. I began to think-Can I hurt them somehow? Physically dominate them maybe? No...the administration frowns upon that and I probably couldn't finish my degree. Can I yell with all my lungs until they are nothing but a puddle of fear and hormones-telling them how miserable they are doing and that their current actions, if continued will cause them to be a failure at school, then ultimately life? No. Also frowned up. Can I do nothing and just ignore it? No. I'm sure that won't work. Do you send them to the office for misbehavior? Hell no. You instantly lose their and the administration's respect. Do you give them busy work? Sometimes. They work very quietly when they have worksheets in front of them. Unfortunately they don't understand how impersonal and sterile that makes things. Today, I will try to keep them more on task throughout lecture. Painstakingly pestering them to look up information for me, which will come at the sacrifice of quantity of information. 

So, after Mr. H's concurring that they are "loopy", we've settled on a heart to heart sort of thing that outlines how they will suffer if nobody can learn. I'm asking for their cooperation in a sense. I want to give them an ultimatum so badly...do this or so help me god I will make your life terrible. Ah! So badly! But I must be congenial and sincere. I will do this alone as Mr. H is taking care of some *cough cough "personal business" in St. Louis. I'm not too worried as I'll have to deal with it someday and there aren't any books that tell you what to do in this situation. Also, the school was kind enough to provide a sub for him. He came in on the 90-minute planning period, which is right after lunch, then gets to observe the classroom while I teach. Meanwhile he gets paid, I get NOTHING...except experience. This "experience" will not pay my sure to be increasing bar tab. Thanks Schools. 

Currently listening-teachers talk down the hall.

Currently reading-my lecture outline. Oh how the arts are neglected now...

First Lesson and First Soup Meeting

My first lesson over WWI is tomorrow. I'm essentially following my CT's regiment. Here is how it will go:
Vocab review: cover the "isms" of the time, militarism, nationalism, etc.
Guided reading worksheet: the kids read the book and answer questions on a worksheet...exciting.
Supplemental discussion/lecture: I cover some of the topics more fully than the text does. My topics for today-trench warfare and the alliance system. Its supposed to set up for the next activity.
Movie time!: All Quiet on the Western Front-the kids will also do a study sheet for the film. I hope they like it half as much as I did the book. This will take us up to the end of the hour. Funny/true story. My actual lesson plan that is graded will take 4 pages of writing...yay bureaucracy!

Currently Listening-Commit This to Memory by Motion City Soundtrack, also the rain from hurricane Gustav.
Currently Reading-my lesson plan outline.

Oh yeah, I'll add some pics I'll be using tomorrow...cool stuff!

Also, my initial meeting between me, my soup, and my CT is tomorrow. This is the "introductory meeting". Not quite sure what it will consist of. I think we basically just go over stuff that's in our handbook from the university, our "bible" so to speak. Let's hope I pay more attention to it...

Week Two

My second week of action has brought me to the one thing I can bet that is common across the nation in schools...routine. Call it consistency, call it predictability, call it boring, call it comfortable, call it what you will. Thus far, its a tad bit boring, but let's remember that I've spent the first week in school just observing. Let me give you a quick outline of my schedule during this last (and next week):

Each morning begins with a confused awakening as my customized alarm belts out Smokey Robinson's "Ooh, Baby, Baby" (surprisingly soothing to wake up to). I still haven't gotten used to the early mornings and I have struggled to remember why I'm waking up this early, and also exactly what time "this early" is. I choose between Pop-tarts, toast, and cereal every morning, but usually settle on Pop-tarts because I don't have to spread butter or jam on them and they are more filling than cereal. I pack a lunch that usually consists of leftovers (once again because it involves less energy than making a special lunch), sweet onion kettle chips my girlfriend "acquires" from work, and something sweet-lately its been a cream-cheese flan. 

I make the 5 mile drive fairly quickly as the streets are usually empty. I do however sit at this certain stop light right outside the high school for a good 3-4 minutes simply watching a never-ending stream of cars go by. I usually get into the school by pushing the yellow light to the max and forcing the oncoming cars to yield to my impatient vehicle. Upon coming to a stop in the parking lot, I have to search for my ID badge and throw it around my neck, no matter how bad it stands out against my suit of the day. 

The kids arrive in the classroom just after I drop my lunch into Mr. H's mini-fridge that sits under his computer desk. There isn't a lot of talking for the first block class of freshman honors US history, and I'm OK with that. Actually, it seems the other teachers are more talkative than most of the students in the morning. I grab the wooden chair and take my seat at the front of the class, but just off to the side of the podium that sits in the front. Throughout the day I busy myself with changing from that chair and Mr. H's while I grade the worksheets from the previous day. 

After two straight blocks (3 total hours of class time) of this sort of action, it is lunch time. But before we get lunch, we have SWOOP duty. I'm not sure if its an acronym, or simply the title of something. All I know is that all teachers have a SWOOP duty. Mr. H's is on the third floor, in the boy's bathroom. We basically have to look out for kids trying to skip/be late to class. We haven't caught anyone yet, but its still early. I'm not sure of the penalty of being caught out in SWOOP. I should probably read up on that...As we get out our lunches, my leftovers and Mr. H's block of colby-jack cheese, an apple, and a diet Lipton Ice Tea, W. comes in. He's been teaching there for three years now. He's a nice young man and seems to have a pretty good head about himself. Him and Mr. H usually talk about the Cardinals baseball. Sometimes I join in and am thankful that it doesn't really take much to sound like you know what you're talking about with baseball. It seems that if you get into it for a year and listen to some announcers, you'll have many of the secrets of the game revealed. This seems to be an inside route amongst the teachers. Usually within 10 minutes, Mr. O comes in from down the hall to let us know his opinions on things. He's an old bastard with a bald-U pattern and a white moustache. He likes to hike up his jeans as he talks. He is also right about everything. Also, he will talk your damn ear off. One of the first days there he decided to talk to me about my History teachers at the university that he knew, and of course all of them had flaws. I got him to shut up by simply saying "well, we all have some faults I think...except for you of course". He took it in good humor, but got the point. I try not to talk to him that much, just like the other teachers. 

We have a planning period attached to lunch that goes into the third block. For me, that means I have an hour and a half to vainly prepare my lessons and fill out the lesson plan guides that will be scrutinized by my soup and by our education advisor. For Mr. H it means time to check out the news online. He's got his routine locked down. He's tired of surprises. I am too, but I'm not quite in the position to deal with it like he can. 

The last block of kids are easily more excitable/annoying/talkative than the other groups. They've had lunch, and they've lost the lull that follows lunch, and they are ready to go home. I continue my grading while simultaneously keeping an eye on the kids to see which ones might give me trouble when I get up in front of them. There are a few, but they don't notice me watching them. Right now I am nothing to them except some kid in a suit that looks like he might have to do something in front of them sometime. They don't realize I will be running their class for the next three months. 

Finally its time to go. Mr. H and I bolt with the students and try to make it out before the buses jam everything up. That's basically it in a nutshell. I think that is pretty much how my semester will be. I will of course be adjusting for the use of my free time. Right now, its OK. I've got my first day of teaching written up and am just waiting for the chapter to be finished by Mr. H, then I'm on. Consequently this blog will probably updated less frequently after that. I'll do my best though. More later-

Currently Listening-Chase This Light by Jimmy Eat World

Currently Reading-All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque-This is responsible for my awesome-present tense narrative. If you haven't read this book, drop what you have planned and do it. It is elegantly simple and strangely profound. Guess its a classic for a reason.